I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize