His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
You need Xanax blowdarts
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
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