Whats the glycemic index on semen?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
i believe in u and ur pee
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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