he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
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i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
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She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
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