I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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