He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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