I wish my penis had an off switch
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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