Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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