She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize