I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize