If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize