Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize