She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize