if you like me you must not know who I am
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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