1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Gay?
German.
Pity.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize