Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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