Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize