don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Life is so much better after having sex.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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