i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
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i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
We're too hungover to prance.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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