I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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