I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize