google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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