Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka?
Forever.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize