haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Bring me that man meat
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize