Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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