Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Randomize
Follow @tfln