i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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