He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
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