he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
so let's talk penis.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize