Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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