I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize