I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize