i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
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after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
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DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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