What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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