Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize