He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize