what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize