Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize