so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
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I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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