This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize