I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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