The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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