You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize