Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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