She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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