girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize