What did we do last night that was yellow?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
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I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
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HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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