Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize