fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
