If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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