i permit you to call me
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
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